Inquiring Minds Want to Know
Previous Chapter: Into the Trackless Woods
Over the last several years, I’ve got the construction all wrapped up. The final contractors have been in and out. I have the automated defense systems activated. It’s been a long ordeal, but it’s exactly the way I want it. I feel most relaxed here. Of all my safe houses, it’s by far the best. Of course, none of the others are anywhere as elaborate; the handful I constructed from the ground up were all small – cabins in the woods for the most part. The others are adapted from existing structures and mostly I just installed security.
Now that this project is finally over, I start to get back to my more traditional job routine. I take probably twice as many jobs per year. Sometimes they’re more involved and take longer to wind up. In any case, it means more money. I can start rebuilding the cash reserves depleted by the construction.
On a job, I avail myself of Jim’s private airline services. I steer the conversation to see if I can get any insights from him regarding my evolving feelings.
I ask, “How do you know you’re in love?”
“I’m not sure. How do you know you’re hungry?”
I shrug. As usual he doesn’t need any response from me to keep going.
“I’ve felt I’ve been in love with a number of my girlfriends. Even though I didn’t always feel in love when we first moved in together, and sometimes the relationship didn’t last long enough for me to feel that way, I always believed we were giving love a chance.
“Of course, it’s more than sharing a house, it’s sharing your futures. When you’re in love, well, at least for me, you talk about long-term issues. Sex is an immediate thing, once satisfied it’s done. Love is a long-term thing. More than just getting it on.”
He pauses his conversation with me to communicate with a waypoint. I’m not sure he’s helping me. I feel more confused.
“When I felt we were in love, we talked about things like growing old together, what to do in retirement, that sort of thing. Of course, that’s just a proxy for adapting into thinking of yourself as a collective unit.”
I look at him in confusion.
Jim explains, “Instead of two individuals, you’re now a single pair. You do things together instead of apart.”
I nod, at least that’s starting to make sense.
“As a couple, you agree with each other before you commit to something, since you’re now committing for the two of you. I find it takes some practice. Particularly when I’ve been between girlfriends for a while. But I like the feeling. Well, when I love my girlfriend I like the feeling.”
OK, so if I understand things, love is a pair thinking long-term together and not making independent commitments. I’m not sure that really helped. I’ll try again some other flight and let his conversation drift wherever it wants to go.